Project Managing My Meltdowns

Some days you open your laptop, see your to-do list, and immediately want to close your entire life. That’s not laziness. That’s a system problem. Nobody taught us how to manage our lives like projects. We’ve just been winging it with vibes and burnout.

I get it. Project management doesn’t exactly scream thrilling life makeover. It’s often a topic you’ll hear someone talk about while using too many acronyms.

But stay with me, because this is actually about how to:

Stop spiraling when everything feels urgent

Learn as you go instead of waiting to be “ready”

Build habits that help you feel more in control of your life

Get stuff done without losing your mind

Wouldn’t that be nice?

Project Management Isn’t Just for Tech Bros

Here’s a truth that took me years to really learn: My brain loves structure, even when I fight it. When I started using simple project tools for my own life, everything shifted.

I stopped:

Forgetting appointments

Procrastinating on stuff I was secretly scared to do

Saying yes to things I wished I hadn’t

And I started:

Setting priorities based on reality

Building in buffer time for when life happens (sick kid, unexpected vet bill, etc.)

Reflecting on what was working instead of always feeling behind

You’re Not Lazy, You’re Overwhelmed

If you’ve been beating yourself up for not reading the productivity book or sticking to the new habit, pause. The problem isn’t your motivation. It’s your brain’s capacity.

Cognitive Load Theory (real science, I promise) basically says: You can only hold so much in your head at one time before it all crashes.

Here’s one way I’ve applied that to real life:

Use a 1‑3‑5 list system each day

1 big thing (the stuff that can move your life forward)

3 medium things (emails, errands, decisions)

5 small things (text someone back, start the laundry, take the vitamins)

This method builds momentum without burning you out. Think of it like a mental anti-inflammatory.

Reflection isn’t fluff, it’s how you level up

You know how sometimes you’re halfway through a project or a week or a relationship and suddenly realize: I have no idea what I’m doing?

Welcome to the club. That moment isn’t failure. It’s just feedback.

Learning science encourages what’s called metacognition, basically thinking about your own thinking. It’s the grown-up version of checking in with yourself and adjusting course. And yes, it works even when you’re tired, cranky, and just trying to make it to (or through) Friday.

One weirdly effective habit: Start a “What Worked / What Didn’t” note on your phone. Do it once a week. Here are a few examples from mine…

Worked: Talking to myself in a British (?) accent while doing stressful tasks. No idea why it helps. But it does.

Didn’t work: Starting Zoom calls at 8am, ever

Worked: Changing into a hoodie as an act of emotional triage. If I’m soft on the outside, I’m 12% less likely to snap.

Didn’t work: Deciding to “completely reorganize my life” at 11:42 PM. I needed sleep. Not a new color-coded system.

This isn’t journaling. It’s process improvement.

Psychological Safety Starts With You

A buzzword I’ve been hearing lately is “psychological safety,” which I’m pretty sure is just a fancy way of saying: People do better when they’re not scared to be honest or make mistakes.

That definitely applies at work. But it also applies to parenting, friendships, or starting something new.

Here’s an idea: Be the kind of boss you’d want to work for.

No yelling when things slip.

No shaming yourself for needing recovery time.

No calling your own ideas stupid before they’ve had a chance to breathe.

The way you speak to yourself when you’re learning or trying something new determines whether you’ll keep going.

You Don’t Need Another Course

Before you sign up for another workshop or planner or habit app, try a retrospective. Project managers use them to look back on what worked, what didn’t, and what needs to change. You can too. Just ask yourself:

What worked?

What didn’t?

What will we try next time?

Try setting a calendar alert every Friday night that just says “Retro.”

Make it five minutes. No pressure.

Bonus points if you reward yourself with something small after (KitKats count).

Final Thoughts: You’re Already the Project

You don’t need to become a certified project manager or read a bunch of neuroscience studies. You just need to treat your life with the same curiosity and structure you’d give to any other meaningful project.

Because you are one.

You’re the project.

More questions, stories, and rabbit holes await... 

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